Father and Daughter playing

Is Your Family “In Line”, or Aligned?

The subject of family alignment is near and dear to my heart, and it has been for a few years now, probably since I first heard it.

Family alignment can mean different things to different people, but in the arenas of family business, family legacy and family wealth, it seems to be more and more common, and recognized as increasingly important.

The first time I tackled this subject, last year, I didn’t just write a blog on it, I created an entire “white paper”. However, since I kind of despise that term, I called mine a “Quick Start Guide”. Link here: Family Alignment – What it IS, Why you NEED it, How to Build It.

Part of what prompted this blog now is my newfound interest in the subject of family governance.  Well, it’s not really a newfound interest in that subject, it’s more of a newfound appreciation for the word governance, especially as it applies to families.

Back in January, my blog, “Family Governance, Aaaah!” recounted how I had come to terms with my revulsion of the “G-word”, thanks to repeated exposure to it from more and more respected places.

Collaboration and Leadership

Around the same time, I read the book “The Collaborative Leader”, and another light went on.  In that book, authors McDermott and Hall talk about two words that seem to have a symbiotic relationship (my words, not theirs).

They explained that the words “collaborative” and “leader” are actually very difficult to separate, because one is almost always used to describe the other. There is almost an implied nature of each within the other, so to speak. (Again, my clumsy words, not theirs)

To collaborate requires leadership, and to lead requires collaboration.

Hmmm, interesting, I thought to myself.  I wonder if I can think of other pairs of words like that.


Alignment and Governance

So naturally, my thoughts lead me to alignment and governance, admittedly, two much less common words.

My thinking goes like this.  If you want to align your family, it needs to be governable, and if you want to govern your family, it needs to be aligned.

Now if you really want to pick holes in my arguments you certainly can, and maybe not just small holes, but bear with me here.  And let’s agree to take a 2017 perspective, not one from 1987 or 1957.

Just as the definitions of collaboration and leadership have evolved, so have those for alignment and governance.


Getting Everyone in Line

Decades ago, having everyone in your family “in line” had a different meaning, likely much more autocratic and “top down”. I think we can all agree that that horse has left the barn.

In the same way that leaders today need to be collaborative and collaboration needs leadership, today’s governance structures exist best in situations where there is alignment.

It seems like this would be true in any situation, not just in the areas of family governance and family alignment.

Where do you Start?

The good news with these pairs of words is that in order to get moving, you can start working on whichever one resonates more.  If you want to help someone with their ability to lead, but they don’t really see themselves as leaders, you can work on their collaboration.  And vice versa.

If you have an aversion to family governance, you can work on family alignment, and for those who think family alignment is too “touchy feely”, maybe you can convince them to work on family governance.

Are You Feeling Lucky?

If you’re lucky, your family (or the families that you work with) will automatically have leaders who love to collaborate and people who “get” governance and are easily aligned.

Most people aren’t that lucky. Most people need to work at these things.

My favourite expression in this regard is “Things don’t just happen by themselves”.

Some of the current buzzwords that I hear and like on this subject are the following:

  •  Deliberate
  •  Intentional
  •  Purposeful

Please recall that your legacy comes from both people and assets, and your wealth and legacy won’t preserve themselves.

Bottom Line: You can work on better alignment through governance, or better governance through alignment, but you need to work on them. Intentionally.