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5 Things you Need to Know: Professionalizing your Family Business

Most family businesses start small and are run rather informally, usually with one or two people calling the shots. As the business grows, more people are brought in, and things can go along for years without much in the way of any formal procedures or written rules.

When one person can no longer stay on top of everything, their ability to delegate will largely determine how much the business can grow.

As the next generation joins the business, a certain level of informality may be part of the culture as well. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but behaving at the office as you do around the dinner table can have its drawbacks.

Many people recommend “professionalizing” your family business, and with good reason. But what exactly does that mean, and how do you do it?

I’m glad you asked…

1. Education

An obvious place to begin is with the education level of the next generation of family members entering the business.

If your children have the ability to go to college or university and get a degree, that’s a plus.

If they can get an advanced degree, that’s better.

If they can do that AND go and get a few years of work experience working for an unrelated business, that’s best.

If you are inclined to hire your kids right out of high school, I urge you to rethink that plan, as their future and that of the company will likely be limited by that choice.

If it’s “too late for that” in your family, there are plenty of education opportunities that last anywhere from a few days to a few months that are probably worth looking into.

It is never too late to learn new things and to upgrade one’s skills and abilities.

2. Hiring Non-Family Employees

The quickest way to professionalize any business is to hire people who are professional in the way they operate, hopefully also bringing along some work experience.

Aim to bring in outsiders who are MORE professional than the people you currently employ, treat them professionally, listen to their ideas, and learn from them.

You can only go so far without great non-family people on your team.

3. Outside Professionals

Every business needs and has outside professionals that they deal with, like accountants and lawyers. They often began with friends or whomever they could afford when starting out.

As the business grows, it is sometimes necessary to move up the ranks and switch to professionals who are at the level you require.

It is quite possible that your business has outgrown your professional advisors, and an upgrade will be needed. It isn’t always easy to cut these ties, but can be necessary.

4. The HR Department

During the growth of any business, the need to begin to treat Human Resources as its own department becomes key. The sooner you acknowledge this, the better.

Your business can only grow as quickly and as far as the ability of your people to grow along with it.

A real HR department will think twice (hopefully) before agreeing to blindly hire a family member and put them into a role for which they are ill suited and unqualified.

This issue has tripped up more family businesses than you can imagine, as mistakes like this cost not only the department where the person works, but can get everyone shaking their heads about what is important to the business.

The biggest part of this comes down to attitude. Have you realized how important humans are to your company, as a resource?

Finding, onboarding, and keeping great people is a must for just about every business. And so is having the right people filling all key roles.

5.   Board of Advisors

Last but certainly not least is the company’s board. I know that even fathoming a true Board of Directors is a complete non-starter for most small family businesses.

So why not start small and informally, with a board of advisors?

The outside perspective alone is worth it, even if it is only to help you look at your own family members more objectively.

Bringing in independent advisors (preferably NOT your current lawyer and accountant) can be the single biggest step to professionalizing your family business. Just ask anyone who has done it.

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Is your Continuity Planning “PAL” in Danger?

This past week on Tuesday, at Noon Eastern time, as I quite often do, I participated in the weekly teleconference of the Purposeful Planning Institute. https://purposefulplanninginstitute.com

I’ve been a member of PPI since 2014 and will be attending their annual Rendez-Vous in July in Denver for the fourth straight time. If I could only attend one event each year, this would easily be the one. http://purposefulplanninginstitute.com/rendezvous2017/

 

Planning Fatigue

This week’s call was about “planning fatigue” and dealt with ideas professional advisors could use to overcome situations in which client families don’t move forward on transition plans as expected, hoped, and required.

Because the entire process is long and complex, clients sometimes lose sight of why they are doing all this work and things can begin to slide, and sometimes never get completed as intended. This can be a huge issue, and PPI is the only organization I know of that actually talks openly about this kind of stuff.

Every Tuesday PPI holds a teleconference, with a host and an invited guest expert. This week’s featured Timothy J. Belber, PPI’s Dean of Fusion, with guest Kristin Keffeler. They’ve collaborated on client family files in the past, which was evident, as they gave plenty of real life examples of situations they faced together.

These PPI weekly calls are all recorded and archived, so even when members can’t make it live, we can always listen to the recording later.

 

Three Major Classes of Danger

While discussing the problems of not completing a family’s planning work, Belber mentioned the three major classes of dangers that exist when things are not carried out to the end.

“Hmmm”, my ears perked up, “I wonder what these three classes are!”

These three main danger areas, can actually serve as the three major headings that we should be thinking about at every step along the way: People, Assets, and Legacy.

 

Checklist?

I wrote them down, and immediately wondered if everything could all really be boiled down to those 3 simple elements. The fact that I am writing a blog about it should give you my answer.

In fact, as someone who thinks in lists of 3, I will now incorporate these into an easy-to-recall checklist, but not necessarily just while thinking of “dangers” per se, but as important elements to always keep in mind.

I expect them to become a good PAL of mine and I don’t like it when any PAL of mine is in danger.

 

People

This one should be front and center, but often isn’t. When we are working with a family to make decisions on “what to do” in an estate plan, tax plan, business plan, or more generally “continuity plan”, I always think about how every decision will affect the people.

(See: https://stevelegler.com/2015/04/12/successful-planning-who-should-be-involved)

Many professionals in this space are specialists in protecting the assets, and they do a great job, but sometimes the people are given secondary consideration (if any).

It should go without saying that when those people for whom we are making the plan are adults, it is wise to seek their input at some point. This is heresy to some, I know, but it is 2017, not 1977.

 

Assets

This element usually doesn’t get forgotten, mostly because it is the domain of so many professionals in the family’s sphere.

I won’t give this one too much space, save to remind you of one of my favourite expressions on this point.

“We spend too much time and effort preparing the assets for the heirs, and not nearly enough on preparing the heirs for the assets.

 

Legacy

This one is a bit trickier because it’s less tangible, but Belber also mentioned his way of thinking about this too, and I want to share it here as well.

He noted that your legacy is what others think, feel, and say about you.

If we try to tie a Legacy to People and Assets, exactly HOW you leave those Assets to those People should be pretty important, shouldn’t it?

If you worry too much about either the Assets or the People, at the expense of the other, your Legacy will surely suffer.

 

Conclusion

Maybe it should be People + Assets = Legacy?

Either way, I have a new PAL. He can be yours too.

 

  

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We Treat Them All Equally – (That’s Good, Right?)

We Treat Them All Equally – (That’s Good, Right?)

Someone recently asked where I stand on whether or not parents should treat all their children equally. I definitely have some strong feelings on the subject, but before answering, I decided to check my 200-plus blogs to see what I had already written on the subject.

I was surprised and disappointed to note that I haven’t really treated this subject adequately in this space, so I decided to change that here and now.

 

For Simplicity’s Sake

Now I am NOT “anti-equality” by any means, and for simple and straightforward situations, it’s clearly the way to go.

However, most families I deal with are neither simple, nor straightforward, and on top of that the sheer size of their assets makes everything more complex.

While simplicity is good, when it’s possible, in complex situations, oversimplifying can cause unintended consequences. I daresay that many parents who blindly insist on equal treatment are just being lazy.

 

Ownership and Management

A major complicating factor that often arises in such families is the distinction between ownership of assets and their management. This is especially true where there is an operating business that constitutes the bulk of the family’s wealth.

The simplest illustration is a family with three children, only one of them working in the business, but ownership given to the three equally. The one managing the business will be in a difficult position, unless they have very understanding siblings (and in-laws!).

Running a business can be challenging enough without having to answer to co-owners whose knowledge about it, attachment to it, and efforts towards it do not match that of the person tasked with managing it.

 

Equitable Division

Rather than simply cutting the pie into equal pieces, I encourage families to shoot for an equitable solution. Synonyms for equitable include “fair”, “even-handed” and “egalitarian”.

You see, sometimes “equal” is not fair, when you look past the simplistic solution of just making everyone identical equal partners.

Parents who leave operating businesses to their children too often do not stop to think about the fact that they are forcing their kids to become business partners, and anyone who has ever had a business partner knows that a good partnership agreement is an absolute necessity. And even then…

Unfortunately, the idea that “Well, as partners, they will be forced to get along!” will backfire much more often than it will succeed, and is NOT a recommended strategy, ever. And it does still happen, unfortunately.

 

Transparency Versus Secrecy

Assuming you actually get the fact that a simple, equal division can often be sub-optimal, then what should you look to do instead?

The possibilities are as limitless as your imagination. But better still, how about including the stakeholders in a discussion and also benefitting from all their imaginations?

In fact, if all the siblings who’ll end up owning the assets together after their parents are gone are involved, and they knowingly agree to an equal split, after considering and discussing alternative scenarios, then equal actually is good.

If everything is decided in an open, fair, well-thought-out manner, with each person comfortable that they understand exactly what they are getting themselves into, then who can argue with that?

 

Worthwhile Discussions

Are these discussions quick and easy to have? Usually, NO.

Are they important and worthwhile to have? An unqualified YES.

Simplicity is good, but not if it is just the result of laziness and a lack of courage to have the discussions that are required.

Adult conversations between family members from different generations can be difficult, especially when so much is at stake. But what’s the alternative?

 

Keep Your Fingers Crossed

Many families have ended up deciding to ignore this type of advice, simply divided everything up equally, and let the chips fall where they may. “Well, that’ll be their problem, they’ll figure it out” is an interesting attitude.

If you really believe that they’ll “figure it out”, then you’re also probably the type who could have the necessary conversations, and you should.

If you say that, and are secretly keeping your fingers crossed that it’ll all work out, then you’re actually likely fooling yourself.

Good luck with that. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

 

P.S.: What About Salaries?

If you’re paying all your kids the same salary, for vastly different job responsibilities, that’s a great place to start fixing things.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Liquidity Events in a FamBiz: Pros and Cons

Part 1 of 2 – The Pros

 

The expression “liquidity event” is not necessarily well understood among the general population. Let’s take a look at it from the Family Business point of view.

Essentially, a liquidity event takes place when the owners of a business, in this case a family, sell a substantial portion of their business (either shares OR assets) to an outside party, for cash or another form of asset that can more readily be turned into cash quickly.

Read more

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5 Things you Need to Know: Family Governance

A few weeks ago, at the end of “Family Governance, Aaaah!” I promised to follow up with more on the subject, in my “5 Things” format. I said it would be out in February, and this being my final blog of the month, that means now.

  Read more

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An Offer He Can’t Refuse

This week contained a flashback for me. I was a guest speaker at a University business school, five hours down the highway. There I was, standing before a group of students getting ready to soon begin their careers, much like I was “just” 30 or so years ago.

Invited by two colleagues/friends who teach “Managing the family Enterprise”, I had sent along copies of my favourite book, SHIFT your Family Business, so that the students could be prepared to ask whatever they wanted of its author.

 

Lucky You!

I began by asking the students if they felt lucky (no, not because I was in their presence). To my surprise, heads began nodding, even before I shared my thoughts about why they were in fact quite lucky to be sitting where they were.

I related my story of being in their shoes in the 1980’s, getting ready to work in my family’s business, but doing so without the benefit of a single course related to Family Business.

This was no slight to my alma mater, it was more about the timeframe. I explained that the Family Firm Institute just celebrated its 30th year in 2016, and CAFÉ (Canadian Association of Family Enterprise) also had its 30th recently. This “field” is still quite new.

I also shared one of my favourite stories about my Dad, who had joined CAFÉ in those early years, and his reaction to the great advice he’d heard from the advisors at those earliest CAFÉ events.

It was quite à propos in this setting, as these were undergraduate business students, like I had been at the time, many preparing to join their family companies in the coming years.

 

“We’re not gonna do that”

“You know, these people at CAFÉ”, I related my Dad’s words, like it was yesterday, “they say that you shouldn’t hire your kids right out of school, you should make them get a ‘real’ job first”, he said, as I nodded, hopefully. “Well, we’re not gonna do that”, he continued, patting me on the shoulder.

For effect, I acted it out with a student in the front row.

I also added that not standing up to him and questioning him, and not suggesting that I would like to pursue that option, turned into one of my biggest regrets.

 

Case Study: Corleone Family

The class uses one family business case for the entire semester, and this year’s choice is the Corleone family, of Godfather fame. “Cool!” I thought, as I learned this fact during a call with one of the instructors a week prior.

I really enjoyed doing “my homework”, watching the movies over the weekend so I could contribute to class. I hadn’t seen them in decades, and had forgotten how Vito actually stepped aside, letting Michael take over decision-making without second-guessing him, well before his unfortunate demise.

 

Family Governance

This class also featured a group presentation on Family Governance, and I have to admit that I got a kick out of the fact that the team used a quote from my book on one of their Powerpoint slides, with attribution, and my name spelled correctly.

Last week I wrote about the Queen and Prince Charles, and now the Godfather, what’s next? (Hint: more on Family Governance).

 

Should Have Refused

Back to the title of this post, courtesy of Vito Corleone, likely recognizable to most readers.

The reason I use it here is to underscore that I now recognize that the key word in the sentence is “can’t”.

More and more these days, kids are in fact refusing their parents’ offers to join the family business. To me, that is a good thing.

I should have refused too, but I didn’t. It would have been better for me, and actually better for the whole family, but it did not fit the shorter-term plan of the patriarch.

 

Love of “Business” vs Love of “My Business”

In response to a question from the class, I suggested that I strongly support teaching the “NextGen” about “business”, and even to “love” business, as part of “financial literacy” and to pass along the entrepreneurial family spirit.

But loving “business” and loving “this particular business that Dad started” isn’t the same thing.

Imagine if Michael Corleone had been able to use his great skills in the truly legit ways he had hoped, without the family baggage…

 

 

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A Very Sticky Baton Indeed!

There was plenty of attention on Queen Elizabeth this week, celebrating her sapphire anniversary on the throne. I laughed to myself, thinking about Prince Charles and how he must feel. “Mummy, when do I get my turn?”

If you are unfamiliar with the “sapphire” anniversary, join the club, but that’s probably because not many people make it to their 65th anniversary of anything. Of course not many people get to be called “Your Highness” for their entire adult life either.

 

Sticky Baton Syndrome

Back in 2015, I wrote a Quick Start Guide (whitepaper) called “Sticky Baton Syndrome (ask Prince Charles)”. So this week when we heard about this anniversary, it brought back the plight of this ultimate “heir apparent”, who unwittingly served as my illustrative sub-title

I don’t normally write about the Royal Family, preferring to share my thoughts on family business and business families, but some overlaps with the monarchy are inevitable.

The Sticky Baton Syndrome piece in fact mentioned Charles in the title only, and I chose him because he is the best known “poster boy” for it.

I recall fifteen years ago, when the woman who adorns every Canadian coin and our $20 bill celebrated her golden anniversary, and part of me thought that she should take the opportunity to walk away on top, sort of like some people were hoping Tom Brady would do this week after winning his unprecendented fifth Super Bowl.

But alas, no, she decided to hang on, and who can blame her, well, besides Charles, I mean?

 

Empire versus FamBiz; Career versus Birthright 

Family Businesses are known for their tendency to look at things with a very long-term view, compared to non-family companies who often only look out as far as their next quarterly earning report.

Age 65 used to be the “retirement age”, but 65 years “on the job” is almost unheard of, and when we do hear about it, it’s rarely in a complimentary way.

So how should we look at family business careers and what makes sense? Well every family is different, and each family business leader is too. But part of my answer lies in the word “career”.

What if the one holding the baton thought about their role as though it were a career, rather than a “birthright”?

 

Different Strokes

There is an old maxim about a 75-year life, divided into 3 periods of 25 years, where you start by learning for 25 years, then working for the next 25, and then giving back for 25.

That framework can work for some, though admittedly not that many people can afford to stop working at 50.

This idea that reaching a point in one’s life where there is a shift in focus fits with Andrew Carnegie’s modus operandi as well. He is quoted as saying “I resolved to stop accumulating and begin the infinitely more serious and difficult task of wise distribution”.

A shift in focus is required, and not everyone knows how to properly prepare for it.

My book SHIFT your Family Business – STOP working in your Family Business, START working on your Business Family is all about that shift.

 

Dying at your Desk

Some people will actually “die at their desk” and a percentage of those would not have it any other way. I hope that those who are waiting for those folks’ batons fully understand what they are in for, because “business succession via death” has never been considered a “best practice”.

Even the papacy may have finally figured that out, with Pope Benedict actually becoming the first Pope in several centuries to actually retire instead of dying on the job.

 

The “Ideal” Way to Phase Out

Here are some suggestions on what a good situation might look like:

  • Scaling back the number of days worked each week
  • Gradually delegating tasks AND decision-making
  • Giving up the CEO role and remaining Board Chair
  • A gradual transfer of ownership to NextGen leadership

If you can start down each of these roads over staggered timeframes, even better.

A key element reported by those who have done this successfully is that they have something else that they are excited to go to, and that they never feel like they are being forced away from their role.

What are you excited to go to next?

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Pruning the FamBiz Ownership Tree

Family businesses come to life in different ways, but their ownership structure usually starts out pretty simple. With the coming of age of the next generation of family members, things inevitably get more complex.

Preparing the rising generation to work in the business is a subject that gets talked about quite a bit. Preparing them to be good owners is also something that we are beginning to hear more about as well. All of this is good news.

But my subject today is based on a real life case, brought to my attention by a colleague. I asked her for permission to address it in this space, because I have not seen much written on it, and it can be pretty tricky.

Unfortunately there isn’t necessarily an easy solution, but then again, in the arena of family business, there rarely is.

 

The Case of the XYZ Family

My colleague and I are members of a “study group” of a dozen or so members of FFI, we come from a handful of countries, and it is always interesting to note the cultural flavour that comes with the stories we share.

The XYZ family is based in another country on another continent. X and Y are brothers, and they own their business 50/50. So far it’s pretty simple. Oh, one more important point, X is a silent partner, and Y runs the business.

I don’t know for sure but will assume that there is no shareholders agreement in place, likely because of the standard, “hey, we’re family, we trust each other, we will work it out” attitude.

 

Arrival of the Next Gen

The business continues along without issue, and the brothers start families of their own.   Y, the active brother, has a son and a daughter. X, the silent brother, eventually also has a daughter.

Just to add a bit more complicating “spice” to the story, Y’s son, Z, ends up going to work in the business along with his Dad, Y. X remains silent. Everything is fine, right? Well, for now, seemingly, yes.

 

Projecting the Future

So if you are Z, the son working in the business, what might concern you, long term? What issue keeps you up at night, to the point that you would raise it with your friendly neighbourhood family business consultant?

If you guessed “ownership”, give yourself a gold star.

The young man has likely already witnessed some of the difficulties that his father has had in running the business while being responsive to a silent partner, uncle X.

When he projects to the future, he sees a situation where he is the only family member working in the business, but his “silent partners” could be his sister, and his cousin.

If ownership follows the standard equal distribution among children that is the default in their country, he foresees himself owning 25% of the shares, and having to answer to his 25% owner sister, and their 50% owner cousin.

 

Sustainability in Question

When something can’t go on forever, it won’t.

Just to make sure we see the difficulty here let’s add another layer. Let’s say Z has five kids, and his sister and cousin only have one child each. And let’s say only one of his kids joins the company and runs it, along with his silent relative partners.

How would it be to own 5% of a company and run it for relatives who own the following shares:

Owner-Manager:        5%

Siblings:                        5%   /   5%    /   5%   /   5%

Cousin:                       25%

Second-Cousin:        50%

 

Thanks, but No Thanks!

Talk about a thankless job. Family businesses CAN last many generations, but those that do are the exceptions, not the rule.

We often look for whom to blame when they don’t last, yet sometimes just the way they are structured and the simple math of family division make it nearly impossible to make this work.

 

So Do We Give Up?

No.

We look ahead and foresee the potential issue, and talk about ways to resolve it. The brother owners need to realize that this can’t work long term, and figure out their next steps.

Assuming that Y can buy out his brother’s 50%, that would resolve a big chunk of it, for now, anyway.

They might even use a formula that Z will be able to follow to eventually buy out his sister down the road.

Bring it up, talk it out, resolve it before it kills the business.

 

 

 

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Family Governance, Aaaah!

It’s hard to get a handle on “governance” sometimes, and depending on the context, its meaning and connotations can vary greatly.

In some contexts, it’s a pain in the backside. In others, you can’t live without it.

Put me in the “can’t live without it” camp when it comes to family business continuity and family legacy.

Governance in those situations can be tricky, but you really need it, and this post will shed light on that perspective.

 

Institute for Family Governance 

This week I was in New York for the first annual “Institute for Family Governance” conference. The IFG is in its infancy, and came into existence at the crossroads of STEP (Society for Trust and Estate Professionals) and FFI (Family Firm Institute).

Babetta von Albertini, of Withers Consulting Group in NY, the Program chair, is a member of both FFI and STEP, and I first met her at the FFI annual conference in London in 2015.

She is the driving force behind IFG and must be congratulated for pulling off a great kickoff event.

She also announced that the 2nd annual IFG conference will take place on January 25, 2018, and that none other than the legendary Peter Leach of Deloitte UK will be a featured speaker.

 

What the Heck is “Family Governance”? 

“What is Family Governance?” could be the proverbial $64,000 question. But it’s more like the $64,000,000 question, because sometimes size does matter

If your family net worth is in the range of $64,000, please skip the rest of the questions, thanks for your time completing our survey.

If, however, your family net worth is in the $64,000,000 range, perhaps this topic is one you need to be paying attention to.

Okay, let me rephrase that.

If you care what happens to your wealth over the next generation or two (or more), then good governance will be important. If you don’t really care what happens after you die, don’t bother reading past this point.

 

What Happened to “Governance, Ugh!”? 

For longtime readers and fans of my work (Hi Mom!) you may be confused by the title of this blog, which seems to suggest, via the “Aaaah” after “Family Governance” that it’s something good, and which brings relief.

You may be thinking “Hey Steve, how does this square with Chapter 8 of your book, SHIFT your Family Business, which I clearly recall was titled “Governance, Ugh!”?

My answers to this are many, including:

  • Thanks for noticing
  • Yes, it IS available on Amazon
  • Evolution

 

The Evolution of Governance

Back in 2013 when I wrote the book and called that key chapter “Governance, Ugh”, I did so based on my perception that the word actually conveyed that “Ugh” reaction to a large number of people.

I like to believe that the world of Family Business and Family Wealth has evolved somewhat since I wrote it, and based on what I heard in NYC this week, it has.

Even if the “world” has not yet evolved, though, I know that I have. Let me elaborate. I have always known that good governance is essential to creating a sustainable legacy for a family.

I used to be afraid to tell people that they needed “governance”, but shying away from the word made it seem “unspeakable”, which may have conveyed that it was also undesirable..

 

My Own Evolution

When the Institute for Family Governance, came to life, and when I realized that I was excited to discover it, that told me that I have evolved, as has my thinking and my desire to call it what it is.

Yes, we can continue to refer to it as “decision-making”, and “communication” and “structures and processes”, and “how we are all going to get along together” and “formalized rules and regulations”.

At the end of the day, for me, the best word to encapsulate all of these is GOVERNANCE.

 

The Real $64 Million Question

The real question is WHY is it required.

My short answer is:

Because your Wealth and Legacy won’t Preserve Themselves.

Family governance is a must, and it must be custom-developed by your family, for your family.

But it is definitely OK to get help with this. It is even highly recommended to do so.

 

To Be Continued

Watch this space for an upcoming blog:

5 Things you Need to Know: Family Governance.

Coming in February 2017

 

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Work with Me, Walk with Me

Work with Me, Walk with Me

This week’s blog inspiration comes from a training program I attended. Noting it in my “future blog ideas” file, I then let it simmer. It’s ready now, so let’s dig in.

We’re in Ottawa, autumn 2016, at the Canadian Institute for Conflict Resolution, on the first day of “TPN-4”, the final installment of their Third Party Neutral program.

We go around and do intros, wrapping up with our observer, a former student, now volunteering as a teaching assistant.

She details her experience in the field, including some with First Nations communities, during which she “walked with the ‘XYZ’ tribe for four years”.

“Sorry”, I interject, “did you say ‘worked with’, or ‘walked with’?”

“Walked with”, she replied.

“OK, thanks, that’s what I thought I heard”, I nodded.

 

Similar, but different

There isn’t a huge difference between the two words, given the context.

Or is there? Of course she worked with them, and that is the way most people would have phrased it. But she chose her words carefully, and I for one noticed.

The biggest thing I appreciated about her word choice is that she was actually describing more than a simple working relationship, it was one where she did much more than regular “brain” or “muscle” work.

But then again, the heart is a muscle too.

 

Journey = Process

To walk with someone suggests some important differences, firstly that the process of helping the client is actually a journey.

Also, when people walk together, there usually is no hierarchy of “you work for me” or vice versa.

I’ve worked with lots of people with whom I never “walked”, and I’ve “walked with” others I never worked with.

Walking with someone suggests that you begin at a certain place and try to go somewhere else, together, hopefully a better place.

You could even leave somewhere and then return, in which case you’re most likely emphasizing something you are doing along the way.

 

“Accompagnement”

Even if you overlook the nuances of “worked” versus “walked”, you still have that other key word, “with”.

In the area of coaching, which continues to make great strides in becoming a mainstream profession, there is a French translation that I love, which also fits this subject.

Some people use the term “Le coaching” in a way similar to “Le marketing”, and others where a French word has never become generally accepted.

I’ve often heard people call it “service d’accompagnement”, that is, “accompaniment”.

That really resonates with me.

I recall one of my coaching leaders at CTI saying that 80% of coaching boils down to two simple (but not necessarily easy) things:

  • Listening without judgement, and
  • Being “with” someone

“Being with”, is very much “accompaniment”.

“Walking with” is accompaniment on a journey.

 

How about a “Guide”? 

Of course when you hire someone to work with you or walk with you, it is rarely just for companionship. Ideally the person can offer you some sort of help, thanks to their experience or expertise.

But there are different kinds of helpers, and it is often tempting to look for “the expert” who can give you the best advice, and then “just tell me what to do”.

In some cases, that’s the ideal way to go. In many others, such as figuring our how to transition your family’s wealth from one generation to the next, just getting experts to tell you “what to do” often leads to sub-optimal results.

 

Guidance helps you get what YOU want

An analogy I like for this kind of work is that of a “guide”. Names like “consultant”, “advisor”, and “coach” each have connotations that bring along some negative baggage and associations to some ears.

I’ve always liked the idea of giving “guidance”, but somehow calling myself a “guide” doesn’t seem to “fit” either.

A good guide “walks with”, helps point out interesting things you may have missed, and keeps you out of places you shouldn’t venture into.

If they’re really good, they don’t even look like they’re working when they are!

They just look like someone who came along for the walk. But how would the journey have been without them?

Who is guiding your transition?

 

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